Acceptance Comes First
Happiness can exist only in acceptance.
George Orwell
When I was in denial of my anxieties and my worries
I could not find peace and happiness
The moment I accepted and embraced my real feelings
Working on them was much easier than I thought
When I was in denial of my coming of age
I did not know how to conduct myself
The day I accepted and took pride in the process of aging,
Age became a milestone in the journey of life.
When I was in denial of my failures and my flaws
I was not aware of the fact that I needed help
The day I accepted and permitted myself to make mistakes
I learnt I could learn from failures without guilt.
When I was in denial of the complications in a relation
I did not pause to take stock of the causes
The moment I accepted and acknowledged there are problems
Finding solutions did not take that long
When I learnt that acceptance is not a choice but the norm
I was not resisting it like how I used to do
The journey henceforth is not of denial and rejection
But of acceptance , tolerance and forgiveness.
Comments
You have reminded me to be easier on myself. Sometimes, we take ourselves much too seriously. As you so profoundly imply, the first step toward solving our problems is to accept that they exist, and that they are a normal part of being human.
Well-said! I need to be easier on myself too.
We are so harsh on ourselves so many times. But understanding and accepting that itself is the first step towards self improvement I guess.
Accepting self, and then the tougher part..to accept those around you as well!
I don’t know yet, but acceptance itself is probably a state of mind. So if we can do it for ourselves then we can do it for others.
So true! We can’t really know ourselves, much less accept and love ourselves, until we acknowledge our deepest flaws. And yet doing that opens the door to a much happier life, and makes it so much easier to accept the flaws in everyone around us.
Exactly. Just like we can love anyone else only if we love oneself, we can accept others only if we learn to accept oneself.
I think that’s very true. If we condemn ourselves, we tend to condemn others as well.
Acceptance is tough. Then when you have yourself convinced that you are okay with you… society has a weird way of making you question ones self. If I were alone in the middle of Alaska, I would be able to accomplish acceptance a bit easier.
I get where it comes from Joseph. But I have learnt that acceptance is the only way. Alaska or middle of Bay Area, you can only accept. There is no dearth of hope for the future. But when it comes to the past and the present, acceptance is the only option available.
Indeed, so true! It will definitely give us more peace of mind. However, its difficult to practice..
When we know it is the only way out, then we have to accept. And we can take a corrective action for the future once we accept. Else we just keep denying it and it keeps coming back to us. This is what life has taught me.
These are wise words. I agree with them – acceptance can really change our outlook on the things we’re going through. When that changes, our ability to respond to our experiences in positive ways changes too. I think one of the best things acceptance brings is a sense of peace. I think learning to make peace with life and all its imperfections is really important if we want to be happy.
You have summed it up so well. Thank You.
Excellent post! You’ve just described the key to happiness! Facing reality and using energy on finding solutions is so much easier than using energy trying to maintain the appearance that everything in your life is perfect, even if the only person you’re trying to fool is yourself.
Absolutely. You have nailed it. The only person you are trying to fool by not accepting is yourself. 🙂
Great post! I found your application of acceptance to so many areas of life very informative.
Sometime ago, I posted about how judging ourselves and others distorts our view of them. We’re not quite as realistic when we judge as when we at least don’t take our judgements seriously — assuming it’s not really necessary to do so, as seems to be the case with most judgments.
Thanks Paul.
Yes, I remember your post on judging. It was the same time I wrote a post on judging and that’s how we connected.
Judgment always puts a colored screen between the two people and we never actually get to see the real person standing on the other side. One of my favorite topics. 🙂